You Won't Believe What I Discovered This Weekend!

Oh Sweet Interpreter, I have made a huge discovery this week, huge! I never really saw it in myself, but apparently I talk too much. No really, I talk way too much. Especially to store clerks and such.

I did myself in this weekend. Saturday morning as we were getting ready for our Leif Erikkson Day celebration on Sunday, we realized that we, Anna and I, had forgotten to ask Dirt to stop on his way home Friday and pick up Salmon. Anna and I had picked up the Korv on Wednesday when we had gone to get her quail and our search for Lutefisk had failed. We hadn't gotten the go ahead from the resident Viking to fore go the lute and replace it with salmon yet, and then I forgot to remind Dirt to pick the salmon up on his way home.

So there I was, in little tiny Yelm, no Vikings in site, not a sign of a Swede or a Norwegian around, not even a Finn or a Dane. I stroll to the back of Safeway after getting a special little treat at the Starbuck counter inside, ya I know, it isn't the same, the Safeway gals don't make 'em like the folks at Starbucks but heck I can't get the kind of entertainment I got that morning at Safeway from inside my own car at the Real Starbuck's drive through.

So I get to the back where the meat and fish counter is, and... What? You want to know what happened up at the front of the store first? Sweet interpreter, for you anything.

But it really wasn't much, just a mom that should have her mom license revoked. Actually I think she only had a learner's permit and she was failing fast. Trust me, she was way louder than her toddler and four-year old were even thinking of being. In fact I was having a hard time even hearing anything coming out of them.

The capper was when she threatened the little ones with their grandparents. Yep, she threatened that if they didn't straighten up she was going to take them to meet up with "Nana and Pappa at Walmart" and they would be disappointed and not put up with their naughtiness.

So after that little show of total parental ignorance, thank you public/group education and peer socialization, ah nearly thirty I suppose and still showing off like in junior high about how tough her life is, show's over, well actually my coffee order came up and I wander to the back of Safeway.

I'm peering through the display case but I see empty spots instead of slabs of salmon.

"Can I help you?" the pleasant voice rings from the stocking hatted and gloved young woman behind the case.

"What do you have for salmon?"

"Ooh, not much."

"Oh, don't say that, I need it to replace the Lutefisk."

"That I have, I have lutefisk," she says very brightly ready to serve.

"No!" my mind screams, "No! No! No! I was nearly home free!"

"You do?" my big mouth says humbly and quietly out loud.

"Yep, right here," she announces as she reaches into the freezer compartment right behind her.

"Thanks," I say, feigning true enthusiasm for her find.

"Not a problem, I'm glad I could help."

I had to go to Wallmart to get wild caught salmon fillets large enough for the party. Sorry unionettes. Fortunately I didn't run into Stupid Mom, her sad parents and slightly doomed children (God still works miracles Sweet Interpreter).

Well It's Not the First Time

My last post isn't the first time I have been completely misunderstood and sure as shoot it won't be the last. I will remove my tongue from my cheek and find something else to write about over the weekend.

Never Say...

Never.

Isn't that how that goes?

Man I'm glad I've had folks tell me that.

My cousin stopped by today and I sure as shoot am glad all my, well most all, my friends have told me that saying over the years. 'Cuz I thought for sure I'd have to send him and his friend packin' when they showed up with a gorgeous F 450 for me. It's even 1960's forest ranger green! They did an awesome custom paint job on it.

Yep, for me.

I was a little shook, 'cuz the whole deal brought back memories, knowin' my cousins like I do. Back in the day I was into petty theft, shopliftin' and jackin' stuff from other folks' houses and yards. I always figured I was headed to bigger stuff. Along with the drugs I was takin', I knew either I'd get too stupid to do it or I'd have to stop before I got caught.

But then I got convicted. No, not in court and thrown in the pokey. I got a conviction in my mind and heart. I wasn't gonna steal from others anymore, even those corporate oppressors. I was only going to have and enjoy those things that I could afford.

I've been doin' pretty good these many years since. I can even go back and give the idjit clerk the extra money she gives me. Or point out that I was buyin' five candles not four and did she want to charge me for that extry one?

So I was pretty convinced that in this area of conviction, I could say, "never."

But man that truck is durn pretty and it will haul lots o' stuff. Even I, will feel safe drivin' over passes to go get Bettikins her Large Black pigs and haul 'em on home in this sweet baby of a truck.

So even though I know how my cousin "gets" autos, I am sayin' "never say never man" 'cause you never know what will cross your path and cause you to be changin' your mind on some of those silly convictions.

Yeah, don't be tellin' me about that commandment that says don't steal. I didn't kill anyone, or even a whole nation and take their land. Heck, talk about theft. The way I read those stories, if you got a righteous enough reason for doin' what normally you ain't supposed ta do, then by golly go for it.

And shoot fire! when I'm lookin' at that truck and thinkin' of all the things I can do with that baby to get this farmin' thing really off the ground and start ministerin' to a bunch of folks that wanta eat good food and come spend a day meditatin' on the Word, then boy howdy it is easy.

And my cousin was tellin' me that he has a line on a couple of places he can pick up a tractor and some impliments. That is sweet! That will so totally polish off the deal. We can really get moving with that set up. I thought we were gonna have to deal with broken down stuff for a long time, limpin' along and never really be gettin' any wheres.

And man it was sweet talkin' with my cuz about our vision of ministerin' to folks through our farm and I was able to talk to him about the gospel and all that, and how I am a new person every day because of it. Man, he was blubberin' and said he so totally understood.

But don't worry folks, he won't be a hard nosed on fire new convert out there buggin' you cuz I remembered to tell him, "no matter how strong your convictions are, never say never." And don't forget to bring me those tractors.

Things Will Be Different This Year

If you have been a Dear Reader for a while and a careful Dear Reader, you know that I consider September as the beginning of a new year for me. No particular date and it takes all of September for me to get over the previous year and look forward to the next. So really maybe the end of September is the mark of the New Year for me.

And it is not just from me and my evaluation and decisions, often others willingly or not participate in my New Year. Things happen at this time of year, things change. Like the leaves. And it all adds up to a new out look for the Lanny Person and it happens in the fall, one reason I love fall, because I love change, I hug it with my whole being.

That said, listen up.

Next Year is going to be very different! Hugely different, knock my socks off different. And it all starts right away, it has already begun.

Last year was awful, it was the worst year I've had in a long time. I can't say the worst year ever 'cause I have lost both my parents, a ectopic pregnancy, a diagnosis of melanoma for Dirt, and other tragedies in previous years, last year wasn't that bad, but really stinking close.

Last year was empty, vacuous, dull, lifeless, dreary, sad, tasteless.

This year is going to be different, way different, last year's problem will be solved with the stroke of one weekend. A smile has crossed my face and peace is in my heart.

We have scheduled a clam digging weekend!

The tide is low and we have reserved a spot at Grayland Beach State Park. I will have fresh clams in my freezer. Clam chowder, clam fritters, clams, clams, clams! Everything will be right in my universe this year. Bring on the bad news, I'll hurdle it in one flick, I will have clams!

Oh and the other thing that clinches that this year is going to be the best year ever.... Salmon has officially replace Lutefisk at Leif Erikkson celebration this weekend. I did my bit. I ate the stuff for years, not large amounts, but I ate it. I encouraged my children to eat it and I offered it to others. I did my part. And I have a minuscule amount of Danish in my blood, wrong Scandinavian country and not enough to make my body tolerant of such things. But now, after being a team player, after having my kitchen smell odd from mid-October till the end of January, (the microwave would smell odd till March) I am freed.

Once again this proves contentment. Just when it looks like you are doomed to a life one way, and you settle in, you decide to become content, truly content and you stop struggling, then you can be released. And I am released from Lutefisk served in October. I went to three fish stores and even called up to Poulsbo to see if they had some. But all of them said they will not be getting it in until the end of November. Even the fish store that has faithfully supplied our last few Leif Erikkson Days will not be getting it in. There is nothing I could do short of overnight express from... Minnesota perhaps.

But Dirt has conceded, he quickly granted that salmon would be an okay substitute for the Lutefisk. Yahoo. Now my cold can go away, I don't need it anymore. I can breath deep and smell all the wonderful cooking smells that my kitchen can possibly muster on Sunday!

Have You Ever

read Joel?

The whole of it, all at once?

It is fairly easy, it is fairly small, but it is packed, as oft the Lord's words are for those who read them.

I'm no Bible scholar so I will not pretend to be one. But it has spoken so much to me over the years. I know that some think it inappropriate to personalize the stories from the Old Testament that are meant to be a historical telling or prophetic message for a nation.

But I could not help but see it personally. I can not help but continue to see it personally to know in my heart that the locust ate my earlier life.

I opened the gates of protection, I let them on my land and they destroyed all that was there, all that my parents and teachers had planted, all that in my early years I had cared for and nurtured.

The locusts devoured my life and laid it open and wasted, burnt, lifeless, shameful, the stench that rolled off of a life once devoted to God, to my beloved Christ, was high, it lay in complete and utter ruin. All this at my very own hand of carelessness, rebellion and disregard.

But God is truly amazing and He has restored all that was eaten, burned and trampled. All of it and more than what was stolen or given away. The reality of what I brought upon myself was hard to look at, the repentance was not easy or quickly done.

But God was good, "gracious and compassionate" with me. He did not take my life as He would have been so right in doing, instead He held me in His hand and waited for me, "slow to anger and abounding in love." He waited for me to come to Him, to repent fully and then He began to restore.

He quickly restored beyond what had been given at first to me that I in turn had given to the enemy to destroy. He has heaped far more than I could have ever imagined, far more than I would have ever known to ask for. He has gently but firmly taught me in His ways and continues His instruction. He has renewed my heart and sent bitterness from me. He has gifted me with strength to do the impossible and the undesirable. He has protected me. He has let me see. He has freed me. He has blessed my children, and put a song deep within my heart.

He has indeed restored what the locust had eaten.

Princessless

So something else I heard at the fair...

I was walking into the barn down at the far end and was pulled up short by the crowd, so I changed gears, slowed down and listened to the people around me. I spotted a nice little family, dad, mom, a baby in the carriage, and a little big sister about eight or ten. Dad looks like he can build things with his hands, I like that, and maybe they have shopped at Cabellas a couple of times. Mom is nice looking, wouldn't expect her to be overly sweet and she is no "mean girl". Nice family.

Dad says to eager daughter, "Now honey, there are a lot of really neat things in here, but a lot of dangerous things too. So you need to stay right by us and not run ahead. Okay. Princess."

Needle on vinyl scratch again. Uck.

Take all those notions back. Dad probably won't shop any where but Cabellas and he is the only one who knows how to fly fish and hunt the right way. Mom most likely never leaves anything out that isn't being used, helps people all the time but never needs help herself and is never more than two pounds off ideal. But then with a husband like "perfect man" what else would you be like.

By the time I get to our booth at the other end of the barn I am ever so glad Dirt never called his girls "princess." What a horrible thing for them to live up to or live with. How do you spell spoiled and out of control? P-r-i-n-c-e-s-s. Thanks for not being, or think you are, a knuckle scraper Dirt.

Real Quick Thought, Honest

I really must plant garlic today and get started putting tender flowers in their winter hibernation, so I will have to make this quick and leave my big fat long convoluted discussions with you, Dear Reader, for another time, like when I'm caught up to at least last month's to-do list.



Can we, followers of Christ, really expect extraodinary lives, while relying on ordinary mind sets?



If we feel the nudge, from the Holy Spirit, to take a solid stand (stick with a Spirit-led conviction), to walk a narrow untrodden, or nearly so, path (be really weird looking to just about everybody including "church" folks), but then we allow fear of man, fear of loss, or pain and or challenge to grip us, causing us to turn to decisions made through rationalization, deciding that the best route is the one most folks travel without question, without deep inquiry, the route of least resistance, the route of blending in or looking cool, the route of making sure we are happy and comfortable and receiving what we deserve, what then, Dear Reader, are we to expect that our earthly side of abundant life is going to look like?



Please read this several times, if you wish. Ponder it for days even, before you pen (type) a retort or amen. And if you are inclined to comment, please just let me have your comment before you read others. Have a conversation with me.