How to get Dirt to not only eat, but to even pick up, pizza for a dinner that he will be eating:
- The night before (this is best done late at night when everyone is on edge) allow him to say something amazingly insensitive to you.
- Resist saying anything at that time in retaliation or to grind in that he was a very rude, nay, mean, fellow. But do withdraw from the banter.
- Later, in choked back tears, go to him, hover until he recognizes your presence and then ask if he really meant to be that mean and insensitive.
- Later if he crosses your path ask him for a hug to reassure you that he indeed doesn't think you and your children (or whom ever may be involved in the banter) are the idiot he implied you to be.
- Then the next day nonchalantly have one of the parties involved ask if the group could have pizza because of time and fatigue.
- Not only will he do it, he will actually recognize what and why he is doing the pizza thing.
By the way, Dirt not only read this and said I could publish this information, he laughed as if he was watching "What About Bob". (This incident goes with the previously published post)
This post is specially dedicated to the Coulters! Who really wish Dirt would get over his pizza adversion but are sweet to never make him eat it.